Review: Burn for You by J. T. Geissinger

Burn for You

by J. T. Geissinger

My review:

2.75 stars

**

I know I'm in the minority on this book. All I have seen are gushing reviews about this book, but this was not a good book for me. I had high hopes because I have enjoyed books by this author in the past, but this was very different. This book was as if Disney's Princess and the Frog and Beauty and the Beast had a baby. It has the Beauty and the Beast trope, but it's set in New Orleans. 

This is Bianca and Jackson's story. Bianca is a biracial chef who owns her own restaurant in New Orleans. Jackson is a grumpy recluse and the heir of a whiskey company family fortune. Bianca creates a menu using the whiskey as an ingredient in all of her dishes. So Jackson comes in to try the dishes. He is pretty much a jerk about it, which makes Bianca hate him, but he is secretly intrigued by Bianca. In the meanwhile, Bianca gets bad news about her mother's health and needs money to help her out. So when Jackson comes to Bianca to cater a fundraiser for him, she begrudgingly accepts. Then something happens to cause Jackson to need a wife in order to gain his inheritance and Bianca is the only person he can imagine marrying. He offers her money to marry him and stay married for a period of time. Bianca desperately needs the money for her mother's treatment so she agrees. There are several problems and complications but they eventually fall in love. 

The story premise and the fact that it was set in New Orleans made me look forward to reading this one. But the overly hokey, trying too hard to sound Southern language was a huge turn off. I am not from New Orleans, but I have visited there and I do live in the South. The cutesy Cajunisms were so fake sounding, cheesy and unrealistic. It didn't sound like this author had ever set foot in the South, maybe watched a movie as research or something, because people in New Orleans do not sound like that in real life. It was a terrible, stereotypical, cheeseball version of Southern people. Not only that, some words were so decidedly wrong. New Orleanians do not say nappy, they say diaper. Ya'll is plural for you. You can't say ya'll meaning a singular you. Hoohas are not boobs. Men normally don't say "lady bits". Things like that. 

Also the book suffered from over simile-ation. Way too many sentences with "like a..." or "as _ as a". 
For example: 

"Hotter than a billy goat with a blow torch"
"who looked like a sexless nun"
"he's like a crossbred dog"
"the sugar dissolves like a relationship over summer break"
"Looks like you've been et by a wolf and shit over a cliff, dawlin'."

And that barely scratches the surface. I think it was supposed to be funny, but it did not work for me at all. The language was such a huge turn-off that I almost dnfed numerous times. 

Bianca was so plucky and country bumpkin. Everyone she met loved her. I did not connect with her at all, or Jackson either for that matter. They both got on my nerves. I did not feel any of the emotions I was supposed to. There were several parts that were meant to be sad, but I was not connected enough to the couple to feel it. Plus, the characters were very OTT and melodramatic. The beginning of the story was so long and drawn out but the end was too quick. The ending was disappointing. 

Overall, this book was way too cheesy for me. The story was interesting, but that was basically the only part that worked for me. But, like I said, most people who read this book are crazy in love with it. So give it a try and judge for yourself!